"I have made my notes now you see, on how to build a girl and put her out in the world. Everyone drinks, everyone smokes, boozy Mickey Jeremy is a damn fine woman. You come into a room and say things, like you're in a play. You fake it til you make it. You discuss sex like it's a game, you have adventures, you don't quote musicals. Whatever everyone else is doing, you do that. You say things to be heard, rather to than to be right. You keen at streets lights thinking they are the sun."

Excerpt from How to Build a Girl, by Caitlin Moran

The title of this book comes from the amazing excerpt above, prior to this I had never read Moran before. I have Audible to thank for taking my prior selections and creating the algorithm that brought 'How to Build a Girl,' by Caitlin Moran into my world. In the style of her first novel, ' Moran writes from an honest place, she tells stories that are hilarious, heart warming, endlessly raunchy. I was painfully aware that versions of these things have occurred in her life. From the emotionally invested descriptions she gave I knew that these characters were people she loved and loves, people she knows and knew, things are slanted, picked apart and ingredients added but the skeleton is true to experience. The semi-autobiographical style that is Moran's signature isn't the first genre I usually run to but this content is definitely the sort of fodder that I enjoy. Jokes that are on-par with the Amy Schumer and Sarah Silverman.

I want to be Johanna Morgan, the main character, a young lady at such a fun place in her life's time line. She is figuring things out, making mistakes, being 'adorably filthy' and living a rock and roll lifestyle in London! I do not however envy that things that Johanna eats through out the book, because of her family's struggles to keep food on the table cheese sandwiches are the norm. Also I don't envy being young enough to be an enthusiastic cigarette smoker. I thank my lucky stars very often that I was able to quit that habit before I was able to legally buy them myself, but that's a story for another day. 

Moran touched on a hilarious fact that Mr. Ferguson and I have had a hilarious conversation about in the recent past.

"Any woman can get laid, anytime that she wants. Any woman. Any time. " 

Unlike most girls that I know personally, Dolly Wild, main character Johanna Morgan's alter ego, looses her virginity before she gives her first blow job. Although she manages it with a bit of grace, I'm pretty glad I did it the other way around and I just wanted to tell someone.

#READWOMENin2015 is alive and real in my life. I prefer non-fiction, sociological centered, books that make tears fall out of my eye balls but every now and again a person should throw in a book that makes you laugh more than frown.

Girls need stories like this, girls need writers like Caitlin Moran. Girls need to be exposed to funny stories about masturbation, stories that express sexual desires, confusions and triumphs. Girls need to not live lives of shame. I love her honest attitude and witty words. 

xoxox, kp

This past weekend The University of Minnesota hosted a workshop called ELECT HER, a program that encourages women to run-for and win for political office on their campuses and for government positions. The Women's Center at the U was nice enough to allow me to bring one of my SHE IS (a Project Footsteps program) girls to the workshop. A brave, beautiful, high school student named Nathel took advantage of this amazing opportunity and the two of us enjoyed an awesome day of learning.

Women in leadership is important. These workshops are an amazing aspect of this journey towards equality. Support programs like these, encourage young women to participate more in politics and continue to educate yourself FOREVER.


xox, kp

The words paint Diane's childhood years in Belgium with minimal drama, a typical European cool factor and a girl, the oldest of two siblings, who would grow up to have the title of Princess and more impressively would known by millions of Americans for an effortless dress that swept the fashion world time and time again. To my own surprise though I was more intrigued by the sections of the book in which Diane barely mentions fashion. 

The parts in the book about DVF's mother are so interesting. A woman who survived a concentration camp during the Holocaust. The story includes activism, long lost letters that were written in coal and then found, a tattoo that young Diane envied, not understanding what it really was. 

Diane von Fürstenberg's existence has been full of glamour, overflowing with travel, money, and social status, yet it was not at all devoid of life's normal ups and downs. Born in Belgium this beauty was catapulted into society when she met her first husband, Prince Egon of Fürstenberg. Her successes stem from a delightful personality, her persistence, a genuine need for independence and a sense of style that has carried her through many eras. 

This quote is as applicable to KP as it is to DVF, impulse rules me life - sometimes I pay for it and sometimes I reap that benefit. I try to harness my impulsiveness for good but often my impulses run my show. Seeing that quality in someone so successful gives me hope. 

At one point during the book I started to be annoyed by the obsessive name dropping. After a while I came around to the rational that this 'name-dropping' might actually just be tasteful recognition of people's roles in this story, the work they've done or the contribution to the end result. With a life that included being a Princess, frequenting Studio 54 and other NYC hot spots you are going to meet influential people but the names span such a vast spectrum of players, even the celebrity cynic in me was impressed. The book could easily be turned into a drinking game if you take a shot every time the phrase, "who later became a good friend." or a version of that was used after a name was dropped. 

Something that disappointed me a bit was that DVF never discusses the allowance that her upbringing had on her successes. The only point during the whole book that I noticed an acknowledgement of privilege ***is in this sentence, "I had the advantage, of course, of having social status, but my youthful confidence is what made me push open that door." She is referring to a meeting she got with the editor of Vogue, the meeting that lead to her suitcase of wrap dresses blossoming into a business. As someone who cherishes the incredible amount of blessings I've been bestowed it really grinds my gears when a person lacks the humility to offer up a paragraph or two about circumstance and how a person's can determine everything. People can overcome and they can fall between the cracks but, nothing is ever won or lost by the isolated actions of one individual.

I whole heartedly agree with this statement and I personally hope to remain on good terms with all of the lovers that I've parted with. I never truly lose love, the love like DVF says. "just evolves into another kind of affection." My heart harbors this new feeling as a way of reconciling for the lost romance. Specifically there is one relationship from my past in which I feel both parties were unable to receive closure and that I would rejoice at the opportunity to reconcile. And another relationship, that in spite of a novel worthy break up my ex-lover has been able to maintain a generally healthy relationship with me, he deserves many props for that I suppose. DVF's attitude about romance and partnership stems from her yearning to "live the life of a man, in a women's body." I'm happy to report that I believe we are moving past that kind of wording into a world where a woman is no longer scorned for having sex just simply because it feels good and is now 'allowed' to enjoy her sexuality while not being confined to the idea that 'that's how men live.'

DVF said these words at a graduation speech, I think they are beautiful. A bit generic and cheesy, but that is why they are applicable and romantic. Take them with you as you leave this space, DVF's life was the stuff of passion, dreams, fantasy and she'll have you believe that with hard work your's could be too.

Back in 2010 I read a book called Half the Sky: Turning Oppression Into Opportunity for Women Worldwide and it moved me, enlightened me and made me hysterically motivated. It was the first time I really understood how many faces feminism has. It was a harsh realization that the kind of equality that I was fighting for was not nearly as dire as what girls in the third world are facing. I learned a lot, was inspired, unable to ever change back or to relay on my ignorant bliss for comfort. 

At that point in my life I was really sponging up as much of the world as I could and this book was sort of lost in the middle of an awakening I was having. I was starting to understand the interconnectedness of the world's troubles, I was becoming aware that humanity's closet is overflowing with skeletons and that my passion for change might not be enough.

A particularly emotional internship with Greenpeace in the spring of 2010 left me so prepared to work for change, I was educated on issues, I endured activist trainings, I had networks and causes that I believed in, but ultimately I went back to Minnesota feeling incredibly defeated. 

When all you do is learn about how fucked up everything is, day in and out reading about climate change, mountaintop removal, fracking, and then clock out of environmental activism at night to read books like 'Half the Sky' - it's a wonder I didn't jump off of something. Overloading with sadness is something I do in an effort to balance the privilege life I've had. It's not the answer. Being educated about social issues is good, spiraling yourself into a deep hole of depression is not good. 

I still get a gut reaction every time I see that book on my shelve, it's a reminder to keep working for good, keep fighting for change. Support men who support women, always speak with respect for everyone's circumstances and celebrate progress.

READ THIS.

But this amazing book, this amazing movement, thankfully, didn't stop there. 

Sheryl WuDunn and Nick Kristof followed up HTS with A Path Appears, a book and a three part documentary series that is being shown on PBS the next two Mondays nights. The first installation happened last week but you can catch up, watch it here. 

When I learned where the title for the project came from I was so excited! Sheryl WuDunn explains the origin and that a path appears after people walk it, over and over. This title makes the movement more visual and reminds you that the work, the actions people are taking is what makes it a movement and not just a wordy idealistic idea.

I have a problem with starting the series with George Clooney but that is all I will say, I think you can probably assume why and I won't waste more time explaining my rational. It's not important, I tweeted and moved on. 

The first installation was broken up into four parts. The first was, In The Life. The second, Falling Through The Cracks. Third, Turning The Tables. And lastly, Creating Opportunities. I have a feeling that the following installments will also be set up in the same format so that they four pieces have some continuity. 

One specific story that made me feel dumb and shocked, was that a girl working in Tennessee could get up at 6:00am on a Monday and have her best 'shift' of the week. She can turn tricks for men who have been "stuck at home with their wives and families all weekend." It bewilders me and I am ashamed that my idea of prostitution was all Saturday nights, Las Vegas grungy, truck stops or high paid escorts. 

At first I was skeptical about Nick and Sheryl inviting celebrities along on this journey but after watching Blake Lively exclaim that she now understands that,"handcuffs don't have to be tangible," I changed my tune. Meaning that she is now aware of the systems that have failed these girls, she sees the pathways that are seemingly inescapable for a lot of people. Ashley Judd was so in touch and so amazing. I fell more in love with Malin Ackerman when she made a point about getting more men involved to make it (sex trafficking, buying sex, etc) a shameful thing. The extra exposure that comes with the celebrity aspect is undeniably positive and I look forward to watching more women learn and live through this project.

Watch this with your sons, your lover, your friends, tweet it with the hashtag love. You never know who you are exposing it to, it could make all the difference. Start a conversation, retweet something, your share might just add to someone's empathy or understanding levels and that could make all the difference. Be educated, give yourself ample language with what to discuss these social issues. Be enlightened, support projects that support women.

xoxox, kp